Jersey Shore, NJ Men: If You Think I’m Beautiful, Walk Up & Tell Me
I recently came across an article written by my friend and fellow WOBM on air talent, Diana Tyler, that hit a nerve within me.
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She writes about something that just about every women on this earth personally knows about: Catcalling.
So I felt it necessary to write about my own recent, personal experiences because if we talk about it, we raise awareness which eventually will result in change.
That is what I want. For the generations to come to never have to experience what I have.
So here we go.
I was taking my dog, Carolina, for a walk.
Now in case you didn't know, these past few months I have been going through some serious health struggles.
So when I saw walk...I more mean hobble. Everything I do is a "task" and is not easy.
During this trek, I bent down to pick up Carolina's poop (as I hope all dog owners would) and what did I hear in response?
Two guys yelling out the windows of their trucks and honking their horn.
Ew. I can't even pick up a pile of crap without being sexualized. Cool.
That isn't even the only example I have for you....from this week.
Melatonin has become my best friend these past few months...it is a magical, magical thing.
I went to the Shoprite in Toms River to grab another bottle and while walking into the store, I passed by a man walking out.
I hear, "Hellllloooooo Woooo!"
I turned around and made a face of disgust.
Do you really think hollering at me from afar is somehow going to result in me handing you my number and decide we are going to get married?
Has this tactic ever worked?
For those of you reading thinking to yourselves, "Don't you enjoy getting the attention?" you are part of the problem.
I need to be able to go into a grocery store or take a walk with my dog or step out of my apartment without being turned into something sexual or someone letting me know what they'd love to do to me from afar.
Think I'm beautiful? Want to talk to me?
Then the answer is very simple: walk up to me and tell me that like a fellow human being.
"Hello. I don't mean to bother but I just wanted to let you know I think you are very beautiful. Can I get your number to take you to coffee sometime?"
Is that so hard? I bet your success rate with this approach would be a heck of a lot higher.
In all seriousness, this catcalling crap has got to stop. It is not a compliment. It is not cute.
It is rude and demeaning.
I encourage everyone to continue this conversation with Diana and I because it has got to stop.
Don't think it is happening to your wife, your daughter, your niece? Unfortunately, it is.
Don't think it is happening at our Jersey Shore bars, restaurants, boardwalks, stores and more? Unfortunately it is.
So many of my friends and coworkers have had daughters in the last few years.
They will not experience what I have.
And writing pieces like this to draw attention to this topic is the start.
If you have been catcalled or harassed or anything of the sort, I am sorry you experienced that.
If you ever need support, you are always free to email me at Nicole.Murray@townsquaremedia.com.
Think before you speak.
Words have a much longer lasting effect than you think.
Nicole S. Murray