The Zombie Apocalypse Has Begun
Why is everyone not freaking out about this? Why isn’t the army setting up safe zones? Why hasn’t the president made a statement?
A Miami man has been shot by police after eating the face off another man. Click here for the full article AND videos!
My girlfriend claims I have an irrational fear of zombies. I disagree; I think it is a completely rational fear.
I would like to highlight a few excerpts from the above article:
The head of the Miami Fraternal Order of Police, Armando Aguilar, said drugs are at the root of the attack. “We have seen, already, three or four cases that are exactly like this where some people have admitted taking LSD and it’s no different than cocaine psychosis,” Aguilar said.
OF COURSE the authorities want you to believe it’s just some drugged out wacko. But three or four cases have already been reported that are “EXACTLY LIKE THIS” ?!?!? Why did it take three or four cases to reach the news?
In the cases Aguilar mentioned, he said the people have all taken their clothing off, been extremely violent with what seemed to be super-human strength, even using their jaws as weapons. “Extremely strong, I took care of a 150 pound individual who you would have thought he was 250 pounds,” Aguilar said. “It took six security officers to restrain the individual.
SIX COPS to restrain ONE GUY? Oh man, we are in trouble. Start building an arsenal.
The officer saw what the man was doing, and ordered him to stop. He said the man growled at the officer, and then returned to his meal. The officer then used his service weapon and shot the man, Aguilar said, but the gunshot had no effect. Other sources confirmed that the man refused to obey, and continued his attack. Aguilar said the officer had no choice but to keep shooting until the attacker was dead.
Read that again. The attacker GROWLED at the cop. The gunshot HAD NO EFFECT. Seriously, this is it. This is what watching all those zombies movies has prepared us for.
You may think I’m crazy (like my girlfriend does) but I have prepared a Zombie Contingency Plan, or ZCP. No offense to any of you, but I’m hesitant to reveal my plans for fear of having you steal my ideas.
Keep it tuned to 105.7 the Hawk for updates, we are your Zombie Information Station!
What is your ZCP? Leave your comments below!