We've all been staring at maps of the United States for what seems like an eternity, seeing which ones are blue, which ones are red, which ones turned from red to blue, which ones are sort of purple, and which ones just can't make up their damn minds.

Red and blue aren't the focus on this map, though, as PornHub has released the most common searches for each state. Boy, the results are something.

PornHub
PornHub
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Well, first things first, New Jersey's most popular search is "MILF". Not very kinky, and not an uncommon search, as we share it with Pennsylvania, Maryland, Vermont, Ohio, Indiana, Illinois, Kentucky, Wisconsin, Iowa, Missouri, Arkansas, and Washington. Lotta people out there who either have mommy issues or just like the cougars.

The second most common search is "Lesbian", which tops the searches in Alaska, Idaho, Oregon, Louisiana, Nebraska, South Dakota, Texas, Virginia, and West Virginia. Again, sort of a bland fetish, but whatever gets you through the night.

"Asian" is a common search in six states, "Threesome" in four...again, mostly tame fetishes. Maine likes BDSM, fine. Connecticut and North Carolina are into the "step sister" trend, okay. Florida searches for "boats", which makes sense. New Hampshire and Massachusetts like teens, that's a little suspicious but not illegal.

Far be it from me to judge, but the fact that "Ebony" is the most common term in southern states seems to be an indication of all sorts of suppressed urges.

Here's where things get weird.

Montana is into "Librarian". I mean, it's not THAT weird. Maybe you have that fantasy of the uptight librarian taking off her glasses and letting her hair down and going wild behind the bookstacks...sorry I got distracted for a moment.

Now let's get really weird:

Colorado searches for "Droopy Balls", which I refuse to believe is really that common of a search. Unless there's one weirdo in Denver who just searches for that over and over and is skewing the results, I can't imagine that people going to PornHub and looking for that specifically.

Oklahoma is into "Goth Hospital". Okay look, I definitely have had a thing for goth girls, but adding in "Hospital" just confuses me. Are Okies combining two fetishes into one, with goth nurses?

Tennessee's most common search is "Kevin James". Nope. This has to be a gag from the staff at PornHub, because no state, country, or planet is looking for Kevin James porn.

Delaware wants to see "Skin". I hope that this is simply some weird way of saying they prefer fully nude actors and actresses, rather than some semi-clothed action. Because any other implication makes me think of Silence of the Lambs and makes me want to stay the hell out of Delaware.

And finally. Michigan, WTF? How does "racist" even count as a porn search term? I know back in the 70s they had Nazi exploitation porn, but I don't get who would be actually be typing the word "racist" into PornHub's search bar.

Did your fave kink make the list?

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