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Men May Want to Keep Laptops Off Their Laps

Dan Kitwood, Getty Images

New science studies come out all time. Every week we find out that something awesome could be bad for us. I normally ignore these studies because I refuse to not participate in the good things in life. This new study though is just too scary to ignore. Apparently it is possible that WIFI from laptops can reduce a man’s sperm count if the computer is on your lap! There seems to be electromagnet radiation that causes the problem. If this study is true I have hurt my chances to have children thousands of times! Now I see why they started to refer to them as “notebooks“. Men and women alike need to spread the word about this story ASAP. If you see a gentleman sitting with his computer on his lap being counting down from 1 million. (1,000,000, 999,999, 999,998, 999,997 etc) At some point a person will ask you what you are doing and you can explain that you are saving the lives of their future kids.

It would figure that when computers become light enough to fit on your lap comfortably and internet gets good enough to be almost everywhere that it would inflict damage. Can’t some things just be good? Food that tastes good makes you obese. Alcohol makes you feel good, but impairs you and can lead to arrests. People say drugs make you feel great, but they also KILL you.

I know some of you may be urged to ignore this new study. Don’t do it! The future of our society may depend on it. Maybe this means we need to reduce our internet time. Only visit 105.7 The Hawk’s website like you did today and spend less time on other recreational sites. Maybe actually focus on work when you are supposed to be doing work. Do you take this new study seriously enough to change your patterns?

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